~ Day 9 ~ YOUR INNER CRITIC ~ Chapter 7 ~
The topic for the next two chapters, Cecil will be talking about what he describes as The Inner Critic. After reading through these chapters, one soon realizes that this topic not only can apply to writing but one could also experience this in singing, public speaking and pretty much everything on a public level to some degree!
Cecil shares a story of his first days of pushing to become published and how they almost became his last. He says, "I felt as if two voices screamed at me--at the same time--and pounded my brain with contradictory messages. One way to explain this to myself is to use the dichotomy of right brain verses left brain."He writes, "The two adversaries warred against each other and neither respected the other. My right brain, filled with wonderful, exciting, creative ideas nudged me. Go for it, Cec. Great stuff. I love it. You can do it, Yes,Yes!"
Cecil goes on to say, "The left brain snarled and tapped my shoulder. This is garbage. No one will ever want to read this. Why would an editor pay you money for this tripe?"
Although Cecil fought his negative voice he discovered the more he fought it the louder the interior volume. He wrote and published articles but the voice still screamed, but he kept on. But even after selling several books, Cecil discovered "the incessant screaming inside my head" didn't stop.
To know that someone as gifted and as seasoned a writer/author as Cecil experienced a trial like this should give all of us that are either starting out or are in our infancy stages of writing, singing, public speaking, playing an instrument or what ever it is we are learning a sigh of relief! We are not alone. Here I thought it was the devil! Cecil also shares an example of a time while he was struggling he mentally screamed in his head "Get thee behind me Satan,"and kept on writing.
After reading books from the experts on the topic and even following some of their advice, and not finding it to be the best advice, Cecil came to his own conclusion. He writes, "I don't believe in ignoring the internal editor; I do believe there is a time to listen to it. If you're open to every part of yourself--and I hope you will be--you can teach your right brain and your left to hug each other and work in harmony."
I would have to agree with Cecil's perspective and advice. There is two old sayings I've come to believe hold truth and wisdom to apply when struggling with the inner thoughts. The first one is,
"If it doesn't feel right, it isn't". The other, "Your heart knows the truth before your head is willing to admit it". I don't just apply this to my writing but to other aspects of my life in general when I seem to be having that inner struggle. As a believer I find it comforting to know that I can take it to the Author and Finisher of my faith, seeking His counsel.
Cecil finishes off this chapter with some more experiences that he had with this issue and shares these words of wisdom. "I now listen to my internal wisdom. Why consider the internal editor an enemy or an nuisance? Why not engage that part as a helper? Why fight a part of myself that wants to help? "
It still took Cecil a long time before he could consider that voice as a friend--but he's says that came in time. "Now", Cecil says, "I trust and honor the left part of my brain as much as I do the right side."
The Aphorism for today is : "My inner critic can be my friend, so I honor and trust that voice."
Aphorism # 7: "My Inner critic can be my friend,
so I honor and trust that voice.